8 Effective Ways to Overcome Mom Burnout: It’s Time to Enjoy Being a Mom Again!

Want to know how to overcome mom burnout when you just feel like giving up? Well, I have 8 simple, yet EFFECTIVE ways that you can tackle mom burnout that you must try!

First let me share with you how I can relate to the mom-burnout struggle 😭

Have you ever had one of those days when you felt like everything was going wrong? Or how about a period in life when you were being hit by one crisis or obstacle after another?

Well, I had a week recently when I felt like I was drowning in stress. I had suffering from health issues, which made it extremely difficult to function. Meanwhile, every one of my kids seemed to have one major crisis or another occurring at school. On top of everything, I had important deadlines that needed to be met for certain projects I had started. So needless to say, it was an overwhelming week.

Between phone calls, meetings, my children, my marriage, and managing my own health issues, I was BURNED OUT!

Caregiver burnout has become more and more prevalent. Many parents, especially moms, silently struggle trying to overcome symptoms of burnout. But you don’t have to.

So, What Is Burnout Anyway?

In this Parents article, Dr. Mary C. Kimmel, defines general burnout as, “exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress.” Dr. Katayune Kaeni, Psy.D., then further explains that, “caregiver burnout, in particular, happens when a caregiver (a.k.a you, mom and dad!) has maxed out on their capacity to provide physical, mental, and/or emotional support for someone in their care.“

One study cited on Forbes, found that about 68% of women surveyed experienced symptoms of burnout, compared to 50% of men. Needless to say, parental burnout is a major issue. Sadly, mom burnout is significantly more common.

Fortunately, burnout can be tackled preventively and effectively. As a mom for 20 years and a licensed mental health counselor, I was able to pull out my metaphorical “toolbox” of strategies to overcome mom burnout. Believe me when I say though, I definitely still experience periods of major stress. But through the use of some realistic and practical strategies to assist me, I am able to see the light at the end of the burnout tunnel. And so can you.

Plan Ahead of Time For An Increase of Stress

Overwhelmed mom with kids running around (representing mom burnout)

Whether you’re a mother of one kid, 5 children, or more, mom burnout can happen 🙁

It’s just a part of mom-life. Mom burnout is NOT a sign of your value as a mother. It doesn’t mean that there isn’t fun, love and lots of hugs between you and your little humans. Experiencing burnout as a mom, is honestly a typical part of the overall parenting journey.

When a new mom brings a baby home, her friends and family expect that she will need additional help, for this new stage of life. Parents usually have expectations that there will be less sleep and less time for adult life.

As the baby grows into a toddler, school-aged child, and then a teenager, parents often get forgotten. There’s this societal expectation that we should just deal with the stress, because it’s expected. Well, we can’t fully avoid the stress that comes along with being a mom, but we don’t have to sit back waiting to be run over by stress.

Instead of waiting to be reactive, take a proactive approach to tackling stress! If you know that you will have a busy week with appointments or meetings, plan ahead of time. This can include meal prepping, budgeting for take-out dinners, saying “no” to certain events/activities, or turning off your phone for a few hours. You will decrease your chances of experiencing burnout, if you feel more in control of things.

Delegate, Delegate, Delegate!

mom doing laundry with daughter — Kids Can Help Around The House Too!

Your role as a mom, does not include a requirement to be a martyr. You do not need to work yourself to the bone, in order to prove that you’re being a great mom. Share the workload!

A surefire way to the path of mom burnout, is to take on everything by yourself without seeking help. A CEO of a company delegates work, so why shouldn’t you?

Delegating household work to your children, helps to teach them responsibility. Even younger children can assist their older siblings with clearing away their toys, especially if you turn it into a fun activity. I don’t know about your little ones, but my 5 year old loves to feel like she is being a “big girl” when she helps out with putting away laundry. I doubt she’ll still enjoy helping with laundry in a few years, but I’ll take what I can get!

Another reason to share the workload is so you can promote appreciation from your family for all that you do.

I know, I know…they probably won’t verbalize a single word of appreciation to you today. But I absolutely believe that you’ll eventually see displays of appreciation from your children as they grow and mature. Just start planting the seed today.

When you share the work load, you’ll have more time to take care of your spiritual needs, mental health, and physical health. I strongly encourage you to model self-care for your children, and you will see it will pay off for you and for them in the long run.

Take a Break From Social Media

Social Media image- A definitive trigger for mom burnout 🙁

Social media is meant to help people easily connect with one another, which sounds incredible at face value. Unfortunately, social media can also be a double-edged sword. Often what you see on Instagram is more focused on curating an image of perfection, than it is about real life.

We rarely hear about the morning struggle to get the kids off to school, or see the constant back and forth between pediatrician appointments. Very few moms, share how they they may not necessarily like being a mom that day (or that week…).

When you’re constantly bombarded by images and videos of the so-called perfect, happy mom, it’s pretty easy to feel as though you’re not doing enough. Feelings of inadequacy, can then lead to increased stress about how much you do, which can in turn lead to mom burnout.

Try to schedule social media breaks when you are feeling spikes in your stress levels. Show yourself some grace, and eliminate any negative factors that will make you feel any less than how fabulous you are.

Engage in Prayer or Meditation

I am Christian and my faith in God has honestly saved my life and my sanity. My relationship with God and my belief in Jesus, provides me with strength and encouragement during stressful times.

Prayer and simply talking to God is extremely helpful for me. It allows me time to sit back and be still. Try spending time with God, to uplift your spirit. This can be done anywhere and anytime. Just take a moment (even if you’re in the bathroom!) to close your eyes and connect with God. You don’t have to say a special prayer; simply seek Him.

Reading Bible verses can also provide you with the words you need to hear, when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to think. I share some wonderful verses that have helped me through challenging days in my post, 12 Encouraging Bible Verses For Hard Times. I know these Bible verses can provide a shining light on dark days for you too.

If you don’t feel connected to a religion or faith, meditation can provide a peaceful break when life feels overwhelming. You may need to wait until the kids go to sleep to take time to fully immerse yourself into a meditation session, but honestly it’s worth losing a bit more sleep than lose your sanity. The main goal is be still and let your spirit rest. Consider it a mini “momma vacation.”

Lean on Others for Support

When I was a new mom, I felt incredibly lonely. It was easy for me to feel burned out because I literally never sought help. I falsely believed that “good moms” didn’t need help. Growing up as a child, I was surrounded by women, who took on everything. For them, being the main caretaker meant managing all of the parenting responsibilities with pride.

I regularly observed the moms around me boasting about all that they had done. They rarely looked to others for support. When alone though, these same women were overwhelmed, stressed, and some were depressed. Sadly, I see the same trend today.

We need to be more open with each other about the support that we need!

Believe me, you are not alone in feeling overwhelmed. As moms, we need to support one another.

There are incredible benefits to asking for help as a parent. First, you won’t feel so run down. You may learn new parenting or organization tips from other moms. Not to mention the fact that, when you ask for support, you can reciprocate the support back to another mom in need. You never know who would love to rotate transportation duties with you, just so they can have a break every once in a while.

Don’t forget to look to you partner to share the workload too. You didn’t make this baby alone! For my lovely single mommas, consider seeking a helping hand from extended family member and friends that you trust. Mom groups can also be invaluable when it comes to venting to a group of women who you can relate to the crazy mom life.

Be open minded, and remember that even a little help, can contribute to decreasing symptoms of feeling mom burnout.

Give Yourself Credit!

A Boy Hugging and Kissing His Mother — Best Mom!

Whether you are a stay-at-home mom, working mom, or work from home mom, WE DO A LOT!

Some of the MANY roles that us moms are tackling without pay are drivers, cooks, cleaners, therapist, social workers, childcare providers, accountants, nutritionist, academic advisors, tailors, event planners, life coaches, teachers, tutors, nurses, groundskeepers, maintenance supervisors, plumbers, interior designers, work/life manager and CEO’s!

That’s only to name a few of the responsibilities that we manage!

According to Salary.com, based on their 2019 Mom Salary Survey, moms would earn a median annual income of $178,201, if we were actually paid for all of the diverse roles that we fill. I truly believe that number is a major underestimate of the value that we bring to our households. As a matter of fact, we are PRICELESS!!

Often, symptoms of burnout are proceeding by invasive thoughts telling us that we are not doing enough. At times, we take on many engagements because of our need to prove that we are great moms. Please hear me when I say: You Are Doing More Than Enough.

A practical and useful way that you can use to give yourself credit, is to write down the MANY tasks that you completed at the end of each day. Also, write down your “wins” for the day, no matter how small it may seem.

You can also check out my article, “Try A Self-Love Activity To Bring Yourself Joy!” to learn about more incredible strategies for taking care of yourself.

Use Physical Activity To Alleviate Mom Burnout

Making time to go the the gym may not be practical or realistic for many moms (it definitely isn’t for me!), BUT there are still many other ways to incorporate simple physical activities into your daily routine.

Despite my constant lack of energy, I know that I need to be more active. In order to do so though, I had to get creative with incorporating simple exercises in order to regularly release stress. It’s not always what I want to do, but I know that it’s what I need to do. And you need physical activity too.

So, why should we prioritize exercise even when we don’t feel like moving at all? According to Walden University, “Physical activity kicks up endorphin levels, the body’s famous ‘feel good’ chemical produced by the brain and spinal cord that produces feelings of happiness and euphoria.” We all know that there are many benefits to regular exercise, but most people don’t realize how your lack of physical activity can actually negatively effect your mental and physical health.

Lack of physical activity can increase your chances of developing symptoms of anxiety, which can in turn effect your overall ability to function. Simply put, it’s hard to get motivated to tackle the day when you feel crappy. Inactivity can lead to decreased energy, increased stress, issues with sleep, and long-term health issues. With all that being said, us moms should take advantage of the many benefits of physical exercise. Release stress, improve your functioning, and FEEL BETTER!

Here are some simple ways you can incorporate physical activity into your routine:

Playing tag with your kids!
Walking your dog
Taking the stairs instead of the elevator, when you can
Stretching ( There are some great videos on Youtube!)
Vacuuming your entire house
Decluttering your storage room, basement or attic
Jumping jacks, skipping or jump rope
Yardwork or shoveling
Doing planks (great for core strength, which we need after carrying our babies 😭)
Talking a walk or jog around your neighborhood
Using your treadmill
Dance! (This is a big one in my house)
Have sex more (a win, win for you and your partner❤️)

These are just some of the many ways that you can incorporate physical activity into your busy mom-life, while also releasing stress and improving your health. What are some of your proven ways to be more active? Please feel free to share in the comments!

PLEASE Seek Professional Help, If Needed

I cannot stress enough how beneficial therapy can be. I’m not just saying that because I’m a therapist, I am saying it because I have benefitted from therapy myself!

Think about it: as a mom, where else can you go where the entire conversation is about YOUR well-being? A therapist can provide you with a safe and non-judgmental space to share your thoughts and feelings. Therapy should also provide you with opportunities to learn and explore which coping skills work best for you.

Since the pandemic, there has been a significant shift in how therapy can be accessed. Many therapist now offer virtual therapy options, which can make getting the care you need more feasible.

FAQ: For When You Have Doubts About Overcoming Mom Burnout

What if I still feel stressed?

I wish I could tell you and every mom (and myself!), that you will never experience stress as a mom. Honestly, I do. For better or worse though, we all experience some level of stress at varying times in our lives. Stress does not always equate to a negative outcome though. Stress can provide opportunities to learn new skills, meet new people and can provide perspective when you didn’t realize that you needed it. Furthermore, overcoming stress helps to build your internal strengths, which is absolutely needed as a mom!

What if I don’t have any help?

This a very valid question for many moms. When I was a young single mother, it definitely felt that way for me. It’s hard to feel isolated as a mom. Thankfully in this new era of rapidly advancing technology, there are many innovative ways to connect with others. Moms can participate in online support groups for moms, or women in general. There are also virtual and in-person events that you can try out. I would also encourage every mom to research family support services in their communities. These non-profit agencies usually provide free or low-cost services and various opportunities to connect with other women. Be flexible and open to trying new things and it will pay off.

Can I prevent mom-burnout from ever happening?

It’s difficult to completely avoid experiencing any episodes of mom burnout. Think about it: these crazy, little self-absorbed humans that we created don’t particularly care if we feel mom burnout or not (excuse me, as I silently cry to myself 😢); they just want what they want, when they want it lol. So, although it may be a challenge to eliminate burnout, if you utilize the strategies mentioned in this article, you have a greater chance of beating burnout before it beats you!

What if I want to seek professional help, but not necessarily traditional therapy?

Well, fortunately there are various forms of treatment that may be appropriate for you. You can explore brief therapy, solution-based therapy, group therapy, spiritual counseling, and the list goes on and on. The first necessary first step should be to seek an assessment, by your primary care provider, or licensed mental health professional or social worker to determine, which services are appropriate for you.

PLEASE READ: If you, or someone you know, are experiencing postpartum depression, please seek help from your health care provider or reach out to a close friend or loved one. If you are having suicidal thoughts, or thoughts of hurting your baby, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline immediately at 1-800-273-TALK.